As Coronavirus 2 The Second Wave spreads across the country we look at whether like so many other things, the sequel will be worse than the first instalment.
If so, Coronavirus 2 The Second Wave will rank alongside many other films and life events where the first one is better, and the subsequent ones pale into insignificance. Without even pausing to think we have?
- Jaws 2 (and Jaws 3D for that matter) made us understand that killing the monster doesn’t stop the same thing happening again. And again. And Again. It also made us want to get our eyes tested.
- The Next Karate Kid (part IV) shows that repeating the same thing over and over again won’t necessarily make it better. (Although Cobra Kai did save this, in a tongue in cheek sort of way).
- Titanic II – demonstrated that having a bad name can make bad things happen. Boris.
- Taken 2? Should be retitled ‘That Was Careless’. A bit like ignoring scientific evidence.
- Basic Instinct 2. Just shows that if leg-crossing is the only thing you’re famous for, you probably should leave it there and move on.
Coronavirus 2 The Second Wave will tie up loose ends
As it stands, according to the fun police Coronavirus 2 The Second Wave promises more disappointment and distress than the original. However, we are hoping that some of the key plotlines left hanging in the first instalment will be resolved in the coming weeks. For instance:
- Will Dominic Cummings finally get his eyes sorted, or will he still be perverting (the course of justice)?
- Will Barnard Castle be taken by the King of the North, Andy Burnham? And is it even a proper castle?
- Will Joe Wickes repeat his feats of fitness, or is he now sat at home 2 stone heavier, swigging Tenants Pilsner and tucking into takeaway curries?
- Will quizzes start again, or are we going to ignore people we haven’t seen for six months because we can’t bear those dreaded words “round one”?
- Will six still be the magic number, or will the “rule of six” be replaced with something completely different, like seven, or five?
- Will Boris finally realise he’s the leader of a nation, or will he continue his audition to become the next Dr Who?
And even as we get ready for Coronavirus 2 The Second Wave, Coronavirus 3 is being discussed. The plotline features Covid19 ageing and weak, training up a new ninja-virus, Covid20, in the meat-markets of China, ready to take on the drug crazed capitalist pigs in the western world.
While it prepares, people in the UK flock to pubs they never visited before to indulge in their favourite activities – binge drinking and dad dancing in places they shouldn’t.